


Strange Jutsus and Where to Find Them

by Kaappihomosapiens



Category: Naruto
Genre: ANBU!Kakashi, I try, Injury, Injury Recovery, M/M, Poor Iruka has to suffer for my kinks, chakra depletion, i haven't watched or read the series in years, weird timeline
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-03
Updated: 2018-09-26
Packaged: 2019-02-27 22:43:42
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 14,413
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13258152
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kaappihomosapiens/pseuds/Kaappihomosapiens
Summary: It was supposed to be the last, easy mission before Iruka could start teaching at the academy. But life isn't that easy, and when he gets hit by a strange jutsu he has to adapt being dependent on Hatake Kakashi of all people.He should get a prize from not killing a jounin.





	1. StrangeJutsuTM

**Author's Note:**

> This time it’s time to go back to my roots in Naruto Hell ™ and write some kakairu stuff. That includes injuries because, well, hello darkness my old friend let’s make characters suffer for my personals kinks!
> 
> As I haven’t read or watched the series in years I have basically no idea about stuff. But this takes place at imaginary timeline where Iruka is about to have his first class to teach and Kakashi is an Anbu. I don’t remember names and Googling things is hard so yeah bare with me guys.  
> Also fighting scenes are hard so I encourage you to use your imagination. Grammar and spelling are trying their hardest but I can promise mistakes.

It was a classic thing to happen. An easy mission turning into an A-class one in a matter of minutes. Every textbook in academy stated that a ninja should always expect the worst and be prepared no matter what happened. If a jutsu went wrong or one got ambushed they still should be prepared. So when a group of missing ninjas started following Iruka and his two teammates when they were returning from a C-rank escort mission a textbook example would have been retreating and thinking through the situation to make the best tactical decision - to run or fight.

 

Iruka knew this; he had read the books and learnt them by heart to become a classroom teacher. He was on his last mission before getting a class of his own, having made a decision to rather teach the kids than being on the field. Even the Third Hokage had agreed; it was a calling. But even the textbooks, chuuning tests and years of training hadn’t prepared Iruka and his teammates to suddenly face bored, jounin level missing nins trying to find other ninja to toy with. They had been returning to Konoha, just a couple hours away from there, when their travel had been interrupted by a feel of killing intent nearby and within seconds they’d been attacked.

Iruka had reacted fast, avoiding a fatal bow to his neck and running to take shelter up in the treetops. His teammates had also taken shelter, and they all knew the enemies had allowed that. They were out to play, after all, since they could have done far more damage by ambushing them seriously.

“Come out, we just wanna chat”, one of the enemies, a big ninja with pitch black eyes, yelled. They were looking around lazily, not in a hurry to kill them.  _ Just great _ , Iruka thought, trying to calm down his heart and making a mental count of weapons in his pockets. He was already separated from his teammates, though he could sense them nearby. They had already been driven away from each other, and because they were hiding trying to make a plan together was out of question.

“Oh come on, don’t make us come to you”, the smallest of the enemies said, her hand itching to take a sword to her hand. 

“This is getting boring. I’m going”, she said a second later, and then she was up in the trees where Iruka knew his teammate was hiding. The other ninjas didn’t waste any more time, and the only thing saving Iruka from a kunai was his reflexes kicking in before the weapon hit his side.

“Let’s play”, he hear behind his back. He almost didn’t dodge the first kick aimed to his dead, but the second one aimed at his legs managed to take him by surprise. Iruka tried to get some distance between him and his enemy, but the other didn’t give him a chance to do that. Every time Iruka tried to start casting a jutsu or throwing something other that basic weapons his enemy calmy ruined his chances.  _ Gods _ , the enemy was fast!

They wouldn’t last long. Three chuuning against three jounin was a fight already lost. But they wouldn’t go down without a fight, and if Iruka was going to die he would at least try to make killing him hard for the enemy. He managed to get a explosion tag attached to his kunai before throwing it, forcing his opponent to evade the blast that followed. 

“Oh, you play dirty”, the other said before Iruka felt a kick to his stomach, the force of it forcing air out of his lungs and making him drop to a lower branch of the tree. He hadn’t even seen the enemy move!

_ I won’t make it _ , Iruka’s mind told him, but he tried to push the thought back and use the distance to cast a water jutsu at the enemy. The enemy ninja dodged it easily, but the few extra seconds gave Iruka enough time to set a couple of simple traps around the area. The enemy was nearing again, but now Iruka had at least something he could use against the other. The enemy attacked and Iruka dodged, aiming a kunai to the enemy’s side. It didn’t hit its mark and caused Iruka to get hit by an elbow, but it was still working at his favour. They were near one of his hastily made traps. He avoided a knee to his face, twisting away and managing to land a kick before jumping to another branch. 

_ “Just a bit more,” _ he murmured, barely audible, when the enemy charged at him, clearly getting angry when Iruka wasn’t playing his role as a helpless victim. He jumped at the same branch, taking something from his pocket. Just couple of meters and the trap would be launched. It wouldn’t keep its prey for long, but it would give Iruka enough time to deal with his attacker.

The enemy took the bait when Iruka tensed his muscles, making it seem he was about to jump backwards. The enemy stepped on the trap, making thin wire wrap tightly around his body, blocking all movement.

Iruka let himself pant lightly as he readied his kunai and leaped at his trapped enemy, but halted in midway when he heard a loud cry from below. The battle had taken his thoughts away from his teammates, and now one of them was clearly in big trouble. Iruka looked down. His teammate was down and whimpering on the ground, slightly bleeding through the multiple cuts on his body. The missing nin he had been fighting was closing in, her hands moving fast. A jutsu. Iruka quickly glanced at the trapped nin, then back to the ground. He couldn’t sense his other teammate anywhere near. He had to make a decision. 

He lifted his gaze. His enemy was still trapped, but that wouldn’t last for long. Some of the wires were already loosened up. It would, however, hold him enough to give Iruka time to jump down and prevent a mysterious jutsu aimed at his teammate.

So he did just that, jumping down and aiming his kunai at the back of the enemy down below. She was still in the middle of the jutsu and didn’t have time to react to Iruka stabbing her in the back.

“ _ Take that!”  _ Iruka thought, but his slight feeling of success quickly went away when he felt the jutsu activate, but instead of his teammate he was at the receiving end of it. The force of the jutsu send him flying, and he could really clearly feel his back hit something hard. 

Iruka panted, trying to mentally count how many new injuries he had gotten. It felt like something might have broken, but he wasn’t completely sure. Iruka opened his eyes, checking his surroundings. His teammate had been moved by the force of the jutsu, but seemed as fine as he could in the situation. The enemy nin was on the ground, coughing and sluggishly trying to get up.

“ _ Served her right,”  _ Iruka thought, and then went to quickly check himself over. 

_ “Both hands: good. Legs: moving. Side: maybe something wrong. Strange jutsu that just hit me: still strange”. _

Everything seemed fine enough, so with help of the tree he had hit Iruka slowly, and with some dignity, lifted himself up. The world was tilting a bit, but other than that he felt good-ish. A cough went past his lips and with it came the familiar taste of blood. Okay, he felt pretty bad.

“What the fuck went wrong!” he heard the enemy shout out angrily. The jutsu hadn’t been effective? 

Iruka didn’t have much time to think more about the mysterious jutsu as he felt a blade against his neck, it’s sharp edge pressing slightly into his skin. Not hard enough to draw blood.  _ Yet _ .

“Konoha scum!” the not-so-trapped-anymore enemy shouted and continued in a more controlled voice: “It’s a shame to end this so quickly, but troublesome preys need to learn their places.”

Iruka tried to stay calm, to think his way out of this, but as he felt the muscles of his attacker get ready to slice his throat his body froze. Maybe it had been something else than just a suggestion when the Third Hokage had mentioned that the teaching could be his thing. Maybe he wasn’t cut to be a soldier. Had he been too weak? Trusting? Not smart enough? 

 

The blade cut his skin. He could feel it, he could feel the blood starting to drip down his neck. But the blade didn’t have the chance to go deeper. It fell away as his attacker dropped to the ground, his neck cut open as Iruka’s would have been just a second later. It wasn’t relief what he felt when he glanced at his side and saw an ANBU standing there with a bloody knife in his hand. No, it was pure  _ terror _ . He had never seen an ANBU so close, and even when he knew they weren’t a threat to him it felt frightening to be close to one. No, three actually. The second was over the unconscious kunoichi and the third was checking Iruka’s two teammates for injuries. The relieve of seeing his team alive was enough to make tension leave Iruka’s body, and he allowed himself to drop to his knees.

“Are you injured?” the ANBU asked him, and it took a few seconds to register the words. Iruka took a calming breath.

“Minor wounds, maybe something wrong with my side. Got caught into an unknown jutsu, but it seems it didn’t do anything.”

He felt the ANBU’s hand touch his side and couldn’t help the way his body twitched. The healing chakra was a pleasant feeling. It definitely helped with the discomfort at his side, but as the pain faded the feeling of something being… slightly off hit him.

 

Iruka and his teammates were left with one of the ANBUs as the other two went to clean up the battlefield. The enemies were tied up and kept unconscious, probably left for an another squad to pick up.

Iruka poked his side, grimacing when it hurt. He had been lucky compared with his teammates who were full of cuts and bruises. Maybe a couple of stabbing wounds too. It was hard to tell with them looking like mummies.

“Time to move,” the ANBU next to them said, glancing at them and making sure they’d all get moving. Iruka rose up slowly, his world tilting a bit before his sudden dizziness passed. Weird, he could have sworn he hadn’t taken any serious blows to his head. 

 

They started their way towards Konoha. Two of the ANBUs were traveling with them, keeping their pace slow enough for the more badly injured to keep up with. They leapt from branch to branch, sometimes slowing down just enough to quickly check if anyone was following them and then continuing their way.

It was just an hour away from Konoha when Iruka started to feel a bit weird. He wasn’t feeling any pain, but his vision started to blur from time to time. First it only lasted for a second at most, but as they continued running the seconds started to add up. Finally it got so bad Iruka had to stop for a moment. The blurring wasn’t going away, and he had to lean on a tree to keep standing up.

“Oi! Is he okay?”

Now that he had stopped running his body felt tired; like the energy was leaving him. He suddenly realized the tree he had been leaning on had been replaced by a person. One of the Anbu was holding him up, his hands  _ too  _ warm against Iruka’s skin.  _ Embarrassing,  _ his brain informed, but as he sluggishly tried to stand by his own feet he only managed to lean more on the other person.

“He mentioned a strange jutsu hitting him but not causing anything. Could this be it?” Iruka could recognize the person speaking as the ANBU who had healed him. He tried to tell them that he was fine, just probably suffering from some kind of minor chakra depletion, but he only manage to whimper softly.

Iruka felt the person holding him press his back against the tree. The blurring was fading a bit, and he tried to focus on the mask in front of him. Where there should have been empty black holes for eyes something red was watching him. 

“He’s leaking chakra. Huge amount of it,” he heard the man say. The world was blurring again, and this time it also started to twist and sway. He felt someone take a hold of him from behind as sounds began to fade. 

 

The last thing he saw through the blur in his eyes was the red eye and rapidly moving hands before everything turned black.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hospitals aren't nice places to be. Especially when you get news that'll change your life for a while.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Grammar was a bitch and I'm still too lazy to google names, important vocabulary and everything else. But hey! Second chapter! That's a miracle!
> 
> Please tell if you like this! I appreciate each and everyone who reads this (and comments and leaves kudos - love ya'll).

The scent was the first clue of his whereabouts when Iruka woke up. The bitter smell of cleanliness and medicine lingered in the air with a twist of misery and antiseptics. 

He felt bad. Tired. He was pretty sure he was chakra depleted. It took way more energy than it should had just to slowly open his eyes and look around.

“Good, you’re finally awake. I was getting worried.”

Iruka glanced left, already recognizing the voice. The Third Hokage was sitting in a chair that must have been really uncomfortable, a stack of papers on his lap and a pen in his hand.

“S-sorry,” Iruka managed to whisper. His throat was sore.

The Third smiled lightly, but his smile looked tired. He turned to look at the door just before a nurse entered, bowed at the Hokage, looked Iruka in the eyes and comically hurried to his side when she noticed Iruka was awake. A glass of water was lifted to Iruka’s lips as the nurse held him up and asked way more questions than Iruka’s brain was able to understand. He answered with quiet grunts or small nods or shakes of his head, and by the time the nurse left he was completely drained of energy. He felt the Hokage stand and move to the door, talking quietly with someone before he felt another person’s presence next to the bed. He could feel a hand on his stomach, but he didn’t have any energy to wonder who the mystery person was or  _ why  _ there was a hand on him. Iruka let himself to fall back to the darkness.

  
  


The next time he woke up he felt better. Way more better. Opening his eyes wasn’t hard at all and he even managed to lift himself up a bit before looking around. He was alone in the room. He seemed to be in a more isolated part of the hospital since he couldn’t sense many persons nearby. If he were in the normal rooms there would be more people walking outside the door, and Iruka was pretty sure he would have at least a couple of get well soon cards and flowers in the room if that was the case. Now his bedside table was empty.

Iruka heard the sound of the door opening, turning to look at a nurse.

“Ah, Umino-san! You’re awake again. Are you feeling any better?”

“Yes, I feel alright. Can you tel…” He trailed off as he saw a glance of an ANBU behind the nurse. 

“Umino-san?” The nurse asked, worry taking over her features. 

“S-sorry, I paced out for a bit. Can you tell me what happened? I really don’t remember what came over me.” The nurse backed out from the door, talking to someone - most likely the ANBU - before coming back.

“I have no clearance to talk about what happened, but the Hokage will come here shortly. Just rest until he comes, I’ll come to check you after that, okay?” 

“Okay,” Iruka answered, frowning, trying to put things together. 

The Hokage was involved more than he thought. There was at least one ANBU behind the door and he was not in the public part of the hospital. That together spelt out trouble. He was just a chuuning, and even if his latest mission had needed help from the patrolling ANBU it still wasn’t enough to get him special treatment. Even his close relationship with the Hokage wouldn’t had been enough.

“What is on your mind?” he heard a voice ask. Somehow the old man had gotten in the room without Iruka hearing or sensing him. Talk about Hokage level entry.

“Uh, nothing,” was Iruka’s intelligent answer. He then gained some sense and bowed his head a bit. “Hokage-sama, I’m sorry if I have caused any troubles for you.”

The Third laughed softly. “Not more than you did when you were younger.” The smile faltered quickly, and a more professional look took over.

“Iruka. I want you to know that what we’re going to discuss from this moment onward is classified S-level information.”

Iruka’s head snapped up. His shocked expression soothed the Hokage’s voice as he continued.

“You’re going to treat this as an A-level mission. It’s going to be highly confidential and you’ll report only to me. Are you agreeing?”

“Y-yes,” Iruka whispered, forcing himself to take slow, calming breaths. It wasn’t helping much. What was going on?

The Hokage walked next to the bed, sitting on the same chair he’d been on the first time Iruka had woken up. He looked like he really wanted to just take out his pipe, but instead of that he took out a scroll.

“I take it you don’t have a clue what’s going on?” He asked, glancing over at Iruka, and nodded when Iruka shook his head as a no.

The scroll was opened. Iruka instantly recognized it as a mission report. At least he had learnt something from working at the mission desk so many hours. 

“You were hit by an ‘unknown’ jutsu, as you had stated. I take there was no symptoms at first since you didn’t report any. Halfway back to Konoha you collapsed and one of my ANBU noticed your chakra was leaking out quickly.” The Hokage paused for a bit, letting the information sink in.

“The ANBU had to react quickly. He did what was best for the situation and placed a seal on you. It prevented the chakra to leave completely but it also tied him to you.”

Iruka’s gaze was shocked and sceptical, and the Third felt a twist of sympathy in him. But it was not a time for feelings.

“The seal is on your stomach, if you want to see it.”

Iruka blinked couple of times before the words hit him. He lifted his hospital shirt and there, on his upper stomach, was a round seal. Seeing it grounded him to the present, helping him understand the bigger picture.

“I’m going to know an ANBU’s identify,” Iruka stated aloud. The Hokage nodded.

“The seal keeps your own remaining chakra from leaking out, but the amount you have wouldn’t keep you alive for long. The seal the ANBU used requires the caster of the seal to insert more chakra from time to time. You have been sleeping for a couple of days now, and the times that the seal needs more chakra are completely random and unpredictable.” The Hokage sat up and started to pace around the room. “I can’t have you kept in a room for an unknown amount of time, and I also can’t keep an ANBU following you around. So you’re going to have him close to you as an ordinary ninja.”

Iruka nodded. It was much to take in, but he understood the main points. 

“Hokage-sama,” Iruka asked, “Does this mean I still get to start teaching? 

Laughter filled the room. “You always manage to surprise me Iruka. But yes, you can start teaching  _ if  _ the leaking of chakra slows down enough before that.”

“Thank you, I really -” 

 

There was a slow knock on the door. 

“Come in,” the Hokage said. Iruka swallowed a lump in his throat. He was about to meet one of Konoha’s elite. More than that even,  _ the  _ most elite Konoha had to offer. He’d see the person he’d have to spend the next indetermination amount of time before the jutsu would wore off.

_ If it ever will,  _ his brain helpfully announced as the door opened and -

“Yo.”

_ Hatake Kakashi. It had to be the famous Copy-nin _ . Iruka could have laughed. He, a chuuning ranking teacher-to-be was going to get a world famous ninja as a babysitter and personal nurse. Wonderful.

  
  


Kakashi came to stand next to the Hokage, lifting his hand in a greeting and awkwardly watching anywhere else than on the bed. 

 

The awkwardness was creeping into the air. 

 

“You’re both aware of the mission, its requirements and the high level of confidentiality?”

“Yes, Hokage-sama,” both of them murmured, and then the old man flashed Iruka a smile that said “good luck” more than any words could had.

The door then opened and Iruka let out a shaky breath. The nurse from before peeked in, bowing her head. “Can I come in, Hokage-sama?”

“Of course. I’ll get out of the way. Kakashi, keep good care of Iruka for me?”

Kakashi shrugged, hands itching to take his famous orange book from his pocket. The Third closed his eyes and shook his head, sharing a last glance at Iruka before leaving the room.  _ Hang in there,  _ it said, and Iruka relaxed his shoulders. It would be fine, he would survive and continue living his normal life, right?

 

Kakashi didn’t make a move to leave the room even when the nurse closed the door and came next to Iruka, asking questions about how he felt. Iruka answered the best he could, but his eyes kept turning towards the other ninja in the room. It felt a bit weird that Kakashi hadn’t left, but considering he was now in charge of not letting Iruka die by chakra depletion there had to be a reason he was there.  _ I bet I’m not going to like this,  _ Iruka thought and winced when the nurse poked his ribs. To keep his mind away from the poking he focused looking at Kakashi. The other had given in to the temptation to read the orange book he always carried around, trying to look relaxed even though everyone and their mothers knew he was highly uncomfortable. The thought made Iruka smile. 

 

Kakashi was trying to focus on a rather smutty part of the text, but he kept reading the same sentence over and over again. If it was up to him he would have fled the room minutes ago. But he was on a mission, and in reality he had brought it upon himself when he made the decision to use the jutsu on Iruka. 

He heard a quiet yelp and turned his eye toward the bed. The nurse was poking a rather nasty looking bruise.

_ Umino Iruka _ . Soon to be classroom teacher to many hellish little kids who want to be ninjas. A person had to be crazy to want to teach humans who would be able to kill a jonin by accidentally making unpredictable flight paths with kunais. But what he had gathered with his mission brief with the Hokage Iruka also had a temper. At least the way the Third had said it had sounded like it wasn’t Iruka who would want to cry in a classroom full of children.

 

Kakashi quickly came back from his thoughts when he saw Iruka suddenly lean forward with a pained expression on his face. He was beside him in an instant, even reacting faster than the nurse.

“Please wait!” the nurse yelled, lightly grabbing Kakashi’s hand before he even started the hand seals. 

“Umino-san may react differently to your chakra now that he’s awake. Please start slowly. And Umino-san?” she said, gently shaking Iruka and stopping when the man in pain nodded to show he was still listening; “Try to relax. It’s hard to accept other person’s chakra, but we don’t have much time to practise.”

Iruka nodded again, seeing Kakashi’s hands move after the nurse nodded at the other’s way. A hand went on his stomach and the other landed on his shoulder, pushing him backwards until he was laying down.

 

The pain of one's chakra leaving was nothing compared to someone else trying to force theirs in. It felt like someone tried to stab Iruka with a dull knife, and with a loud, pained gasp he tried to swat the source of his discomfort away.

“Is it working?” Iruka heard the worried voice of the nurse as his hands were taken in a strong grasp. 

“Kind of. But I think he’s going to - yeah, he passed out,” Kakashi said and shrugged. It at least made his job a bit easier - for now.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: Do you hate my cliffhangers yet? Passing out is an easy way out of ending a chapter. I don’t make promises about changing my ways, maybe I’ll end all my chapters like this? That’s actually a very good idea. Yeah. I’m a genius.  
> I almost died when I accidentally wrote “The door then opened and Iruka let out a shaky bread” when i was really, reaally tired. You’re so welcome.  
> (And I say this AFTER I wrote about being an intelligent person. Weh).  
> Shaky bread. There went my dignity, hopes for the future and my last brain cell.  
> Zas


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yay. Third chapter. I actually doubted I’d get this far but here I am with my spelling mistakes and words that don’t make sense to me after reading this through too many times. God, I wish I could write this in Finnish but if you’re a Finn you understand why writing this kind of stuff in Finnish is the worst thing you can do besides, like, eating frozen peas with chocolate.
> 
> My co-worker does that. Yeah. Needed to get it out of my system.  
> But here you go, enjoy! I apologize!

Iruka had came familiar with passing out. With the amount he had done that he could almost call it a hobby. Receiving chakra was still difficult and painful, but with some practise and a lot of fainting he had learnt to at least keep himself conscious. Most of the time.

It felt weird to have another person’s chakra in his body. Like there was too much things going on in his body, something that he’d rather have out of his system. It wasn’t helping that for the first couple of days in the hospital the chakra decided to leave him hanging at random times; once while he was eating _soup_ of all things (it had ended in a mess) and then he had gone to the bathroom to clean himself and it had happened again. That had been really awkward, hanging onto Kakashi while half naked and getting the remains of his tomato soup everywhere. At least after that he hadn’t been the only one needing a bath.

The nurse had explained that while he had Kakashi’s chakra in his system he shouldn’t try to use jutsus to prevent possible damage due the unfamiliar chakra in his body. Iruka had actually laughed at that, the nurse really thought he even  _ could  _ do jutsus while just eating anything liquid was risky? Kakashi had looked at him, a spark of amusement in his eye. The nurse hadn’t looked so entertained and had continued to explain what he should and should not do while having his chakra messed up.

  
  


“Umino-san, I can’t stress enough that you need to be careful until you have healed.”

“I understand. I really do.”

The nurse sighed. Two days had passed and Iruka was more than ready to get out. All his other injuries were fine and he could have more awkward chakra transfusions back home too.

“Please, this place is driving me crazy.” 

“You do understand I have to go with you?” Kakashi’s voice cut in.

_ Unfortunately,  _ Iruka’s mind notified him. Or then Kakashi was implying he would get crazy in his own home too. With Kakashi in there he might. Iruka nodded, keeping his thoughts to himself. 

“Umm, about that,” he said, a bit unsure, “What’s going to be the story we’ll be telling people? If they ask, that’s it.”

 

More like WHEN people would ask why Hatake Kakashi, a famous ninja with a Sharingan and a knowledge of thousands of jutsus was staying under the same roof as Iruka. Even if they could hide that they wouldn’t be able to hide the fact Kakashi would have to follow Iruka to the academy too. 

“It’s all figured out,” Kakashi said smiling, taking out the orange book. Iruka knew he couldn’t say much when the nurse was still in the room, but he wished he’d gotten even a bit more detailed description. 

“Right,” Iruka breathed out. It was going to be a joy to be around the other man. A real joy.

  
  
  


A day later Iruka got the news he’d been hoping for: he was released from the hospital. The nurses were a bit unwilling to let him go but Iruka couldn’t care less. He was itching to go back to studying and making last minute changes to the timetables and lesson plans. In two weeks he’d have his own class to teach. 

If he survived that long.

He wasn’t allowed to walk to his apartment, and since he was forbidden of using chakra the use of jutsus was out of question. Iruka had to swallow his pride and cling to Kakashi as the other man formed hand seals and made them appear in front of Iruka’s door.

The world twisted, but it was nothing new.  _ Master of dizziness,  _ his mind added.

“Is your head okay?”

Iruka lifted his gaze up to look at Kakashi’s eye. He seemed amused. And Iruka realized he was still clinging onto the other. 

“Why are you asking that?” Iruka asked, trying to gracefully secede himself from Kakashi. And then he realized.

“Master of dizziness?” Kakashi repeated, smiling and putting a steadying hand on Iruka’s shoulder as the other swayed.

“Oh my god. I said that aloud.”

“You did.”

 

Silence fell over them, but all Iruka could focus on was the hand on his shoulder. It was warm. He realized two things then; he was cold and they were still standing outside his apartment.

“Right, the door,” he laughed. He’d just have to use chakra to -

“Umm. A problem.”

Kakashi lifted his head from the book he was reading. Iruka had no idea when it had appeared in his hand.

“I kind of have a few traps here and there…”

Kakashi gave him a look that said  _ are you kidding me _ . 

“Traps you usually pass with chakra?

Iruka nodded, scratching his neck.

“Great.”

Kakashi closed his book. Put it carefully in his pocket like it was the most precious thing in the world. He then lifted his forehead protector and Iruka couldn’t help the silent _wow_ that left his lips. The Sharingan was spinning slowly, checking over the exterior and looking at the traps. It only took seconds for Kakashi to disassemble one of traps on the door and open it. Iruka thanked him and stepped in his house, quickly checking that everything was where he left them. His papers were on the table, creating a controlled chaos all over it, but besides that the place looked good enough to let Kakashi follow him inside.

“So…” Iruka started, scratching his scar as Kakashi looked around. There wasn’t much to see, really, considering that his apartment was small. Just the basics, nothing too fancy. He lived alone, after all.

“Make yourself at home, I guess? I have a spare futon somewhere, or you can sleep on the couch. Whatever you like more.” Iruka looked at Kakashi. The other was focusing on the pictures lining a wall next to the bedroom door. 

“Hm? The futon is fine.” 

“You can look around if you want to,” Iruka suggested as he made his way to the kitchen. He hadn’t let much food laying around because of the mission, so a trip to a grocery store would be necessary. They’d also have to find the futon. As he and his friends got older spending nights in friends’ houses wasn’t a thing anymore. Until they went drinking, but after that most would even welcome the bathroom floor as a bed. A futon would be unnecessary luxury.

 

Kakashi had taken the invite to see his way around the house. At the same time there was and wasn’t a lot to see. The place was small. A bit cramped. But it held a warm, cosy feeling that made him want to curl on the couch and drink something warm. There were little details everywhere in a form of photographs, items, books and colours that made the place feel special.

 

Iruka was going around the kitchen, his ponytail swinging slightly when he bend down to look at the lower cabinets. The kitchen table next to him was filled with papers. Kakashi made his way to them, casually picking some up.  _ How to be a good role model for children,  _ said the paper on his hand. 

“Put it back to the pile where you took it, please,” he heard Iruka’s noise behind him. He was now organizing his belongings in the living room.

Kakashi put the paper back down. The atmosphere was taking a slightly awkward turn, but Kakashi didn’t know what to say to break it. God, one could be an excellent ninja that could kill with a tap of a finger but handling social situations could still be hard. 

“Uh, if you want to help you could get the futon? It’s in the bedroom closet, in the one far left,” Iruka asked. “It’s also okay if I go to get it myself, it’s -”

“No, I’ll get it.” Kakashi was really thankful at least one of them got enough social skills to try lighten up the situation by giving him something to do. 

 

Iruka sighed. If it was going to be so straining to be under the same roof with Kakashi the weeks to come would be absolutely horrible. If it would only be weeks. _That_ was a thought Iruka didn’t want to have.

He moved the living room table out of the way, making room for the futon near the wall. Jounin and ninja in general were known to be paranoid about where they slept; in the field making smart choices about where and when to sleep could save one's life. If Kakashi was going to spend his nights on Iruka’s floor at least he was going to make it as comfortable as possible, and if that meant creating a safe corner to the another he’d do so. 

He was about to walk away when his foot caught the edge of the carpet. Nothing a ninja couldn’t usually avoid, but in his current state he couldn’t steady himself with chakra. So his body tilted forward, and the last thought before the floor got closer was  _ here we go, _ but he didn’t get the chance to meet the hard ground. 

“Are you okay? Is it the chakra?”

Kakashi’s arm was around his middle, holding him up. His eye was checking him over for any signs of trouble, but it quickly looked up when he noticed nothing was wrong. He tilted his head, looking a lot like a puppy not understanding what was going on. 

“Uh, I actually just tripped over the carpet. No harm done. No dying or pain, thank you,” he laughed, a blush creeping up on his cheeks. Great, first he took an elite ninja out of active duty and then he made the same ninja save him from stumbling. 

 

The same ninja was also still holding him. Kakashi’s arms felt warm and his close proximity didn’t help the situation a bit. Kakashi seemed to notice the same thing since his hands quickly fell to his sides and he stepped away, looking at the floor.

“I bought the futon,” he said offhandedly, turning his gaze towards the mattress instead.

Iruka thanked him and went to put it next to the wall. He could feel the other man’s gaze on him, but it didn’t felt intruding. More like the other was curious.

And then, after all the trouble Iruka had put into Kakashi’s sleeping place, the one Kakashi had chosen, the man in question said: “I could have just slept on the couch.”

_ What a bastard. _

  
  


The need of food drove them outside to the grocery store. Before they left the house Kakashi had checked Iruka’s chakra levels since they couldn’t be seen walking casually next to each other. They were on a mission, and being seen together would rise questions they’d have to answer since they never hung out together.

The trip outside went well, Iruka’s chakra behaved like it should and Kakashi was nowhere to be seen even when Iruka could feel the other’s gaze bore into his back. He didn’t even have to explain the reason of his absence to anyone. In the way back a wave of dizziness hit Iruka and he felt Kakashi move closer, but the feeling went away as fast as it had came and Iruka motioned the other to stay hidden. He was fine, he didn’t want to blow their cover in a busy street just because his body was messing with him. If anyone saw Kakashi and him together gossip would reach every ninja in the village within a day, and even though they had a explanation ready Iruka would rather die on the street than deal with his friends and acquaintances asking stupid questions and winking eyes at him.

 

Back at Iruka’s place he started cooking. Or he tried and then Kakashi was behind him, peeking over his shoulder. 

“If you are silently judging you can do it further.”

“I’m not judging,” Kakashi said, “but that stew looks like it’s going to come alive and kill somebody. No offense.”

_ No offense my ass!  _ Iruka turned around and pointed a ladle at Kakashi, getting a bit of stew on the floor.

“I can cook for myself,” Iruka said, annoyance clear in his voice.

“And I could steal all of Gai’s green jumpsuits. The fact you can doesn’t mean you always should.”

Iruka threw the ladle in the pot and walked away, yelling “You do the food then!” and slammed the bedroom door shut like the adult he was.

 

Kakashi was left at the kitchen, looking at the door and then to the murderous stew that Kakashi swore was watching him back.

First day of the mission out of the hospital was going well from both of them.

  
  


 

The thing that saved the day was that the food Kakashi made actually was better than what Iruka usually managed to make. Not that he’d ever admit that. He’d also keep the amount of ramen he usually consumed a guarded secret. 

They were eating in silence, but Kakashi was looking at Iruka and the piles of papers the other had moved in the corner of the table. Iruka was clearly serious about his new role as a teacher. But why a teacher, Kakashi thought. There was reasons why he hadn’t taken any students under his command. One reason was, well,  _ children _ .

 

Iruka looked up, his facial expression saying  _ why are you staring  _ so clearly it was almost amusing. Well, Kakashi now had Iruka’s attention, so it wouldn’t hurt to ask what he’d been wondering about.

“Why do you want to become a teacher?”

“Hmm?” Iruka’s gaze got softer and he swallowed the food he was eating. “Oh, I like being around children and I think it’ll be something I’ll be really good at.” Iruka hadn’t expected Kakashi’s question at all, but it was nice the other tried to have a small talk. “I talked with the Hokage about it and he too thought it was a good idea. If it doesn’t work out I can always go back to the field,” he continued, shrugging at the end of the sentence.

“I didn’t think anyone would be crazy enough to risk their life  _ inside  _ Konoha,” Kakashi said with a smile that didn’t look forced. 

Iruka laughed. “Apparently jounin aren’t the only insane persons in this village.”

 

They finished their meals with occasional chatting. They talked a bit about what teaching would be like, if the kids would be a handful and Kakashi’s dogs - the other was really private person, but Iruka was glad he was at least able to get some information out of Kakashi. They most likely would have many, many days to spend in each other’s company, so it wouldn’t hurt to get to know each other.

  
  


After the meal Iruka volunteered to wash the dishes. At least that was a task that couldn’t be ruined.

 

Or so he thought.

 

One second he was carrying the plates to the sink, and the next there was the sound of plates breaking as Iruka sank to his knees. The pain was bad, maybe the worst so far; his fingers were turning numb, there was a burning pain inside of him and his body was cramping. He couldn’t breathe, could hardly notice anything going on. Iruka’s vision started to fade, his head was hurting, he was going to pass out, he -

“Breathe, I can’t help if you don’t cooperate.”

Kakashi’s voice was soothing, helping Iruka to get himself back to the present.

“Good. Focus on me.”

The nurses had told Iruka that before he could receive the chakra he’d have to focus on where he was, what was happening and get past the pain to help Kakashi transfer the chakra. So he gasped for air and focused on the warm hands on his neck and stomach. The hand on the back of his neck was rubbing in slow circles. He focused on Kakashi’s presence, the way his chakra felt, the sound of his voice as he spoke nonsense to him. Or maybe he was actually saying something important, but Iruka couldn’t care less as the pain of the almost foreign chakra entering his system hit him fully.

Gradually the pain lessened, leaving Iruka a tired, aching and headache filled excuse of a human being. The hand on his stomach went away but the other stayed on the back of his head. His head felt like it would explode in a minute and Iruka was forced to close his eyes since he was also starting to get nauseous.

 

He could handle puking on the kitchen floor, but his dignity wouldn't allow passing out.

  
  


In the end he did both, but Kakashi never told him about the puking.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I promise with a hand on my heart that this chapter has at least million spelling mistakes and such so if you spot anything major we can play Where’s the Grammar Mistake. It’s a nice game, leave a comment and expose the mistakes!
> 
> Uh, I had such a hard time writing this chapter AND I managed to figure out one extra chapter even though I talked to myself about keeping this short & nice but nooo I can’t have nice things. I wish I’ll feel better about the next chapter, I want to improve some things in my writing but eh, let’s face it, it’s probably not going to happen so again bear with me & leave comments and kudos! But be gentle with comments since I fear them!
> 
> \- Zas


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Appears two months later with no dignity left* Sorry for the wait! I got stuck. I have to save other excuses for later use. But here’s the chapter, I finally made it! I can’t promise the next chapter will be published soon but I’ll give you my word, I WON’T leave this unfinished. I don’t want to do that to you or myself.
> 
> As always comments are appreciated and feared.

“Is it really necessary you will sleep right _here_?”

Kakashi slumped his posture and looked away. It wasn’t like it was ideal for him either.

“Your condition gets bad in a matter of seconds. The amount of time it takes me to get here from -”

Iruka waved his hand, cutting the other in the middle of a sentence. He was tired, he wanted to sleep. He didn’t want to have this kind of argument now. “It’s fine, just sleep here then. This is a mission, after all.”

“Okay,” Kakashi answered, shed his vest on the floor and casually jumped on the bed with his orange book ready in his hand. When he had gotten the book out, Iruka had no idea. He sat up. Looked at Kakashi. No reaction. _Okay._

Iruka laid back down with a sigh. “Turn the light off when you finish reading, please.”

As he was falling asleep he also remembered the trouble he had went through with the futon. Stupid Kakashi.

  


Kakashi occasionally glanced at the figure beside him. Iruka fell asleep quickly. Easily. Like it was natural for a human to do.

It hadn’t been easy for Kakashi for years, not since he started to take the higher ranked missions. Even if the happenings of those missions were often erased from paper it was harder to get rid of the images of blood and bodies from one’s head.

 

Iruka’s chest moved in sync with his breathing. He was relaxed, not ready to jump up if an enemy appeared. That was strange; for years Kakashi had slept near people on missions but they were always on guard, a weapon nearby and body ready to kill or run. But this person, Umino Iruka, a chuuning, hadn’t seen enough blood, betrayals and enemies to feel like he had to fear when he slept in his own home.

 

It was weird, but for most people this was normal. A cosy house, pictures of beloved people on the walls, the smell of food in the kitchen. Okay, their situation was far from anything anybody would call normal, but everything else was like reading a fantasy novel and figuring out dragons really existed. This was something Kakashi never had.

 

Kakashi’s instinct jumped in when the figure next to him whined softly and moved. It was a false alarm, Iruka had just changed his position.

Well, Kakashi could also try to sleep. It wasn’t happening, he knew it, but resting was never a bad thing to do, especially now that he too had to keep his own chakra levels good enough to help Iruka. So he lovingly put his book on the nearby table, switched off the light as quietly as possible and laid down. And for some unexplained reason he actually fell asleep for real, but he’d never admit it to anyone alongside with the fact it was Iruka’s steady breathing that lulled him to sleep.

  


Iruka woke up relaxed, his body full of energy and he was feeling good. It took a moment to realize just _why_ it was a nice chance to feel that way. He moved to lie on his back and glanced to his side. Yup, Kakashi was there, reading his book, and looking tired. And not in the way ninja usually looked after a night in a safe place where they could allow themselves to snooze without dying.

“How are you feeling?” Kakashi asked. He didn’t even lift his eye from the book, just turned the page as he waited for answer.

“I don’t even get a ‘good morning’ after sleeping next to someone?”

That got Kakashi’s attention.

“Just answer the question,” he said.

Iruka yawned and stretched his hands above his head. “I’m good, I guess? I actually feel really good.” Iruka looked back at the other and got a glance that said _are you kidding_. He tilted his head for a silent question of why he was getting that look.

“I though almost dying three times during the night would at least make you feel bad, tired or weak, but it seems I’m suffering those for you.”

It took a moment for the brunet to register the words.

“I… what?”

Kakashi closed his eye and massaged his neck. “You went through three seizures. First one about two hours after you went to bed, and the two others just before the sun rose.” After the second seizure Kakashi had gotten a headache and it was still not going away.

He slowly rose up in a sitting position and looked at Iruka. His hair tie had been lost during one of the seizures, and the hair almost reached his shoulders.

“Oh. I had no idea,” Iruka said, running his hand through his hair and letting out a nervous laugh.

“Are you _seriously_ saying you didn’t even wake up during those?”

Iruka only shrugged. At least his condition had gotten revenge for taking out the futon for no reason. He got up, got a new hair tie and tied his hair to the usual ponytail. “Anyway,” he started, “Thank you for saving my life. Would my saviour like some tea?”

Kakashi just stared. For a man whose face was almost completely covered he was surprisingly expressive, Iruka noted, and after waiting for a few seconds without getting an answer he decided tea would be good. He had almost died, he certainly deserved the drink.

 

As Iruka boiled the water he glanced behind him. Kakashi had silently moved to the kitchen and he still was looking at Iruka with a strange expression. He was sitting by the kitchen table, leaning on his hand and seemed to be deep in though. After a while he noticed he wasn’t the only one staring and his eye curved up in a smile.

“What’s so funny?” Iruka asked as he turned to search his cabinets.

There was a silence for a second before Kakashi spoke.

“You know, you’re proving to be an interesting person.”

“Why so?”

Kakashi shrugged and turned to stare outside the window. He didn’t react even when a cup of tea was placed in front of him.

“It’s rude to left a question unanswered,” Iruka said and sipped his tea. The drink was a bit too hot, so he licked his lips and put the cup down. Kakashi’s gaze returned to look at him. His cup was half empty. The mysteries of jounin and their ability to drink scalding hot drinks without anyone noticing was something no one had solved.

 

Kakashi was just about to say something when someone knocked on the door. Iruka stood up and went to see who was outside - he hadn’t expected an animal mask to stare right back at him.

“Uh, hi?” he said. If anything he had expected one of his friends to come to see him since he hadn’t contacted them for days. Then again, most likely they had been told something that kept them away from Iruka and his… unique situation.

 

The Anbu bowed his head. “The Hokage has summoned you to the hospital to have a check-up. Please be there within an hour.”

Iruka didn’t even have time to answer before there was just a couple of leaves in a place where the Anbu had been.

 

“Wow, I haven’t heard of Anbu knocking on doors politely. I always use the windows.”

Iruka looked over his shoulder. The other man had moved to stand behind him during his quick chat with the Anbu. “Windows?”

Kakashi scratched his nose. “It usually takes people by surprise. It’s almost amusing.”

Iruka closed the door and moved past Kakashi and back to his tea. It had cooled enough and Iruka took a sip as he sat down. “There’s a reason they knock. I almost stabbed one with a pencil when he appeared behind my back to invite me to have tea with the Hokage.”

 

As Iruka began to read his studies he missed seeing both fear and respect in Kakashi’s eye. Iruka really wasn’t just an ordinary person. His future students should run, hide and leave the village when they still got a chance.

  


The day was going to be a good one. The sun was shining when they walked to the hospital - well, with some distance between themselves. Iruka took a chance to chat with some villagers and a few friends he encountered. The “rumor” about his client being late and stretching the mission had reached people well, and there was no questions about why he hadn’t been around so much.

The news he got from the hospital were neutral. Iruka’s condition hadn’t gone better or worse, so the nurses told him to come back a few days later. They were far more worried about Kakashi’s low levels of chakra, which was ironic considering the situation. Iruka felt a bang of quilt when the nurses poked the exhausted Kakashi and the man in question send him a look that said _please don’t do this to me again_ . Iruka just smiled and whispered _I’ll buy you ramen later_ when they were allowed to leave the room.

 

The ramen was good, but what surprised them both was that it wasn’t hard to be around each other. Not that they’d admit that aloud. They were on a mission, but apart from some awkward silences they had things to talk about and had some good laughs too. The whole situation almost felt like two friends hanging around, which itself was good since the time they’d spent together could be counted in days.

 

Even after Iruka’s chakra decided to leave him in a middle of a shower later that evening he counted the day as a great one, though as Iruka laid on the bathroom floor with a towel hastily thrown over his lower parts and Kakashi hovering over him he almost doubted that.

  


“Do you think I’ll be able to start teaching with my condition?”

Kakashi turned his head lazily towards the sound. He was sprawled over the couch, enjoying the rare time he didn’t have missions that took him out of the town for days or weeks. The time spend with his current mission was the longest he had been inside the village in months.

 

Iruka was staring outside the window. He’d been studying, reading through his notes time after time. He wanted to be a good teacher. Wanted to leave his mark in the future generation of ninjas.

“We still have more than a week left to see what happens,” Kakashi shrugged. “I wish I don’t have to follow you to the school.”

Iruka turned to watch him. Kakashi got a bad feeling he had given the brunet ideas he would not personally enjoy.

“Why not?” There was an amused glint in Iruka’s eyes as he continued: “You’d just follow me around as usual. In a school. With twenty screaming kids and angry, tired teachers all around you. Actually, screaming children and tired teachers with _weapons_. Wouldn't that be nice?”

 

Iruka laughed as Kakashi’s face twisted in grimace. His laugh sounded nice, Kakashi noted, but it soon died away and a more serious tone took its place.

“Is there anything we can actually do if my condition doesn't improve at all? I have really looked forward to be able to teach.” He turned his gaze towards Kakashi, trying to seek out _something_. Maybe a promise about the jutsu weakening and fading away or a possibility that Kakashi would be able to sneakily follow him during lectures.

 

The man in question rose to a sitting position and rubbed his neck. The dark eyes seeking comfort were too much. Iruka was getting under his skin way faster that he liked.

“Maa, you know I can't promise anything. But I hope from the bottom of my heart that I don't have to live to see the day when I’d be surrounded by children with weapons nearby.”

That got a small smile out of the brunet. For some reason Kakashi too felt like smiling.

  


Two days later both of the men had to agree that spending time in such a small place was not doing any good to them. It was a mutual agreement to challenge the world and go outside. They went through their excuse in case someone would ask - they didn't plan to walk side by side but sooner or later (mostly sooner in a village full of ninjas) someone would notice them getting closer. That someone could ask questions. They were on a mission, but given the time they’d shared an apartment and a sleeping surface the original excuse of Kakashi supervising Iruka’s teacher studies was getting a bit old.

 

Kakashi had jokingly suggested shocking everyone with the news that they were dating, but that only gained him a slap on back of his head and slightly red faced Iruka storming off.

 

They went to the training grounds, choosing one that wasn't as used as the popular ones. Iruka went to sit under a tree nearby, making sure he wasn't too close or far away in case someone walked by or a seizure happened. The weather was great, sun peaking through the clouds, and with a help of a good book it didn't take long for Iruka to lose himself in it. It was just him, the nice shade the tree provided, the book about teaching methods and shirtless Kakashi training in the distance.

 

Iruka lifted his gaze. He didn't know if he wanted to feel relieve or disappointment when he realized his brain had tricked him with the shirtless part. He tried to get back to his book only to give up after reading the same sentence three times. He gave in to the urge to take just a small peek. Just a quick, harmless peek.

 

Even with the loose clothing one would be an idiot not to see Kakashi was fit. His moves were exact. Sharp. _Really nice to look at,_ Iruka thought, but decided not to continue that line of thought.

And then Kakashi’s hands were moving, his hand slamming into the ground and from the smoke appeared…

 

Dogs. Adorable, dangerous ninken.Iruka swore his heart just said _fuck this_ and decided to leave his body. It was a feeling a bit too familiar as he watched Kakashi pet a big bulldog. The bastard seemed to notice, because the next second he was waving in Iruka’s direction and blowing him a kiss. Iruka decided to concentrate on the book again. The book didn't make him question things. A good book indeed.

  


What started out as strange, forced association gradually turned into a cosy coexistence. They slept the nights on the same bed, sometimes waking up face to face. Occasionally Iruka woke up before Kakashi and saw the other sleeping proper sleep instead of the light sleep-ish kind of thing ninjas usually did. It wasn't weird even if it _maybe_ should had been. They ate breakfast at the same table and never ran out of things to talk about. They made food, went through a seizure or two and went shopping, even though they kept their distance and communicated through hand signs.

 

By the time Iruka went through a check-up at the hospital to make sure he’d get a permission to start teaching a voice inside his head was clearly trying to tell him _something._ His condition was getting better. He had more of his own chakra than Kakashi’s on his system and the frequency and severity of the seizures had dropped. The mission would end and he’d get his normal life back and a new life within the classroom, but for some reason he couldn't put the pieces together. Why did he felt like there would be something missing from his life after the mission would end?

 

Even when he was sitting on the floor, going through his notes and Kakashi casually sat behind him to “check the seal" he wasn't able to understand that the warm feeling he got wasn't just familiar chakra circling in his veins.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wish nobody will ever see my browser history. Googling Naruto related things only make it worse - and it’s not good to begin with. 
> 
> I'm so, so sorry this took so long. I got to a point where I didn't know how to continue the story. I’d had liked to write a more detailed version of them getting closer but after a while I realized I just needed to cut corners to move on.
> 
> I hope the next chapter will be done more quickly than this one, but as I’m going to be really busy at work during the summer don’t have high expectations. And once again: I will finish this. Stay with me!
> 
> \- Zas


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well. I finally made it! This has been a nice journey with you guys! I’m also only (about) 5 months late with this :)

 

 

“Umino-san, it seems your condition has healed. You haven’t had any seizures for days, am I right?”

Iruka nodded. There was a strange tension in the room and he didn’t feel like figuring out why. The nurse scribbled something on her notebook. She then put her hand on Iruka’s chest. “Your chakra has completely replaced Hatake-san’s chakra. We have no reason to assume the jutsu affects your chakra system anymore.”

Iruka murmured a quiet _that’s great_ as the nurse continued to write notes. Kakashi was in the corner of the room, staying silent and having a strange aura around him. Like they hadn’t spent days in each other’s company. Iruka was about to say something to the other man in the room, to get a smile or a sound out of the other, when the nurse smiled and handed Iruka’s shirt back to him. “I think it’s time to inform the Hokage about the end of this mission! Hatake-san, the Hokage would like you to report to him. Here’s my notes, if you don’t mind taking them to him for me?”

Kakashi slowly detached himself from the wall he’d been leaning on. He took the notes offered to him and, for a short moment that Iruka would had missed if he wasn’t intensively staring at the other, Kakashi smiled. It didn’t reach his eye, and the next moment there was a puff of smoke. He had almost seemed… sad.

 

Iruka decided to walk to his apartment even though he now was allowed to use his chakra as he wished. It gave him time to sort his thoughts.

It almost felt weird to dispel his own wards when he entered his apartment. The walk from the hospital hadn’t been a long one, but it had been enough to the Anbu or Kakashi himself to empty Iruka’s house from anything that could have indicated another person had lived there for days. The unused futon wasn’t on the floor, the mug that Kakashi had used had been washed and put back into the cabinets. Even the spare towel in the bathroom had been put away.

Empty. The house was _missing_ something. Someone. It was missing an annoying, lazy, porn-reading person who also had made Iruka smile, helped him with studying and cooked things that were more edible than what Iruka mostly managed to make.

Iruka tugged his hair free from the ponytail as he moved to lean next to the living room window. He could hear children playing outside, his neighbour shouting at them to keep away from his garden. Iruka watched the dust slowly float in the sunlight, following the small particles as they gently ascended towards the floor. His apartment didn’t feel like home, it was too quiet inside and even the air seemed to be heavier, so Iruka opened the window to let a breeze of air to take the falling dust out of their trajectory.

“I think I feel sad too,” he said aloud, listening the screams of terror as his neighbour was now chasing the children with a water hose.

  


Kakashi was reluctant to enter the Hokage’s office. He had been standing near the entrance for some time, trying to stall as long as possible. He had already talked to two old acquaintances, harassed the people on the mission desk by hanging out mission reports that should’ve been due two years ago and read three chapters of his precious book.

He stalled because he knew what would happen when he’d step into the room: he’d be forced to go back to his old life. The life of an Anbu; life that didn’t include good sleep, a cosy house or…

Iruka. Kakashi quickly quit that string of thought. He didn’t have the luxury to let himself think about what ifs. It had been a mission, nothing more, nothing less.

He spent a minute more collecting his thoughts before entering the Hokage’s office. He lazily waved to the hidden Anbu before sliding the nurse’s notes to the Hokage. He let himself have a final thought of a warm smile, brown eyes and the smell of books before receiving a new mission.

  


Life continued to move on. Iruka started his new job as a teacher, realized most children were demons sent by Satan himself to terror the earth and developed a temper even the demons quickly learnt to respect. Too bad Iruka had to scare his colleagues in the process, but that only granted him their utter respect and loyalty.

After getting a hang of controlling the energetic children he also started to work in the mission desk. The Hokage had personally asked him since there hadn’t been enough people working there. He didn’t mind. Having two jobs and the demons (children, he corrected himself) running around made sure he was busy and content. The spare time he had was full of grading tests, planning schedules and meeting friends whenever it was possible. He was content that way, life full of things to do and no time to swell in recent past.

One day, after mentally stabbing at least half of his class, he was sporting a class A headache. He had tried to calm the class down by first taking them target practicing - big mistake, the screams of delight before, during and after the practise had almost killed him - and after that he’d sat the tired students back in the classroom to write an essay about How to Throw Things Safely Without Killing A Classmate. It was working out. The sound of pencil scraping the paper and quiet whispers the students thought Iruka couldn’t hear were therapy for his throbbing head.

It seemed the stress of teaching children and then teaching Jounin to fill mission reports were starting to get to him. His headache had lasted for a week, sometimes almost disappearing and then coming back full force. But it was only stress, nothing more, and a trip to the pharmacy would take care of it.

  


Iruka woke up with a twitch. He quickly lifted his head from the essays he’d been looking over, rubbing the smeared ink from his cheek.

“Oh no,” he murmured under his breath. _I fell asleep again._ He glanced at the clock on the wall, physically slumping when he realized it was four in the morning. He had snoozed for three hours.

The half finished essays seemed to laugh at him, and Iruka decided he’d get rid of his tiredness by dragging himself to bed. A bed that was too empty and cold and missed a person Iruka had promised himself he wouldn’t think about.

Well, nothing Iruka could do about that. At least he had space to roll around until he fell asleep once more.

 

“You seem tired, Iruka.”

The man in question glanced up from the gameboard he’d been staring at for minutes. The pawns were mocking him.

“Maybe a bit,” Iruka laughed. “It’s sometimes stressful to teach. I love the children, but from time to time I could donate them to some missing nin.” He moved a pawn forward at random. His head was _so_ not in the game.

The Hokage hummed, moving a pawn, but his eyes were on Iruka. It was unnerving to be in the receiving end of the Hokage’s gaze.

“I’m not lying, really,” Iruka said, because after years of getting that look from the old man he’d recognized it as a one telling him _don’t lie_.”

He got a hum in response. Then, after a while, the Hokage spoke.

“Always remember that you can talk to me. I’m your Hokage, but I’m also an old man you entertain by playing with him. Both will listen to you.”

“Thank you,” Iruka managed to say. And then, with a twist of mischief, “I’m grateful for playing with on old man. Two more years and you won’t remember whose turn it is and I’ll win.”

The Hokage laughed and emptied the board. It would take more than couple of years and they both knew that.

  


Being tired and having a headache started to be part of Iruka’s personality by the fourth week. Even his friends had started to worry, and one even forcefully dragged him to the hospital to win a bet set among them. They didn’t find anything wrong with him besides wanting to sleep and having a head that hurt and all Iruka got out of it was more painkillers and instructions to reduce work related stress by taking less shifts at the mission desk. Well, that he could do. The painkillers were useless, though.

  


“‘I-I’m so sorry! I didn’t mean to!”

“It’s okay, don’t cry. See, it’s just a scratch.”

The little boy crying in horror looked at Iruka’s wrist, seeing the faint line where his weapon had hit. It had already been healed by another teacher who had luckily known how to do medical ninjutsu.

“Next time don’t throw them blindfolded just because someone dares you to do that,” Iruka gently scolded.

“Genma once did that in a bar. He was good” the other teacher next to him said and let out a laugh. Iruka sent him his most intimidating look to shut the man up. He turned back to the boy, ruffling his hair and smiling warmly. “What he means is you can do that when you’re a Jounin. You need to practise to be better, okay?”

The boy nodded, wiping his tears on his sleeve before loudly announcing: “I promise to practise every day! To be as good as that person in a bar!”

Iruka sent the boy off before slowly turning to face his co-worker. Oh, he’d _kill_ the man. He was about to start yelling the man to death when the other spoke in a serious tone.

“Why didn’t you dodge that?”

“W-What?” The sudden question made Iruka forget his murder attempt. “I… I didn’t see it coming. He must have sent it flying in a strange angle.”

The worrying look he got made him feel uncomfortable. “Iruka, last week you almost fell from a tree. Yesterday your sudden headache made you drop a pile of books in the hallway, and now you couldn’t catch a shuriken that even a blind civilian would've been able to see.”

“It’s not that bad. Just this damn headache, I’ll go to the hospital to have it checked again.” Iruka mindlessly rubbed the new scar on his wrist. He really hadn’t seen it coming.

“I think there’s more than a headache. That was a deep cut in a critical area.”

Iruka sighed. He knew that. Without proper and fast treatment he would had lost more than just his dignity. “In my defence he throws hard for a kid of his age,” he muttered, but his co-worker kept a straight face. “Okay, you take care of the afternoon class, I’ll take the rest of day off and go get poked by nurses. Happy?”

He got a thumbs up and a cloud of smoke as an answer.

 

  
Iruka was an honest man. No, he didn’t want to go to the hospital. He’d still do it, get some more painkillers and go back to the school to be a target to pointy, sharp objects.

Or that was what he’d thought. One moment he was sitting on a chair, getting a basic health check and the next second he was greeted with the worried look of the nurse. Within minutes the room started to fill up with more people, all questioning him with hands glowing with chakra as they looked him over.

“What’s going on?” Iruka asked them, hoping for _someone_ to give him an answer. A headache couldn’t be this serious, right..?

“H-hey!” he yelped as one of the people surrounding him tried to push his chakra a little too deep. It hurt!

The realization hit him seconds later. It had hurt. Someone was trying to push healing chakra into him and instead of the normal strange but painless feeling it had felt really bad. _Oh no._

Iruka looked around, his worry growing bigger with every pair of eyes he met: then he looked at the familiar nurse who had been taking care of him the first time he’d been at the hospital.

“Umino-san,” she began, and Iruka knew what she was going to say. The worry started to turn into an ugly pile of fear and Iruka had to start taking slow, deep breaths.

“Your chakra is starting to vanish again.”

  


Kakashi could sum up his state in two words: wet and miserable. They’d been tracking down a group of missing nin for weeks, always getting close enough to take down a few but never close enough to finish them off at once. They’d chased them through a desert, a forest full of snakes (Anko had liked it) and now they were stuck in heavy rain that had lasted for three days. The fact that he was completely soaked with blood in places he didn’t know he had made the whole situation even nicer.

There was a slight rustle next to him. “Boss, they’re on the move,” the small pug that had appeared whispered. He shook his drenched body and got a few extra drops of water on Kakashi.

“Are they coming this way?” Kakashi asked, feeling like he too would like to get rid of the water sticking to his clothes - he really had spent way too much time with his dogs when he actually considered shaking his head to get his hair drier.

Pakkun nodded as an answer. Without missing a beat Kakashi started giving orders to his teammates. His team disappeared, leaving him alone up in the treetop. They’d wait, let their targets come to them, finish the job and get back. What a wonderful thing that would’ve been if life hadn’t decided to be against them.

Well, the enemies did come to them, but they were prepared. It wasn’t a nice, clean, quick fight. No, at the end the ground was soaked with blood and none of the Anbu had escaped without a scratch. Or a stab wound or two.

 

Even Kakashi, who on a normal day would rather sell his legs to avoid hospitals would gladly drag himself to one now. He had broken bones, a wound on his side and he had used most of his chakra. The Sharingan was painfully throbbing from using it too much and it was hard to stay conscious.

And he was among the few who weren’t as seriously hurt as some.

With only one medic on the team they dealt with the most serious injuries and focused on securing their emergency camp. They’d hidden the bodies of the enemies, making it look like nothing had happened - it was a miracle they had managed to do that in their condition - and sent a message to the village about the mission.

 

 

It came as a surprise when a note arrived in less than a day.

“Weird,” one of Kakashi’s teammates muttered, voicing out what the whole team - or at least the ones conscious - were thinking. “Our letter shouldn’t have made it to Konoha yet.”

The hawk carrying the strange letter flew to the extended hand of the doubtful Anbu. The letter was carefully removed and opened.

“Captain, it’s addressed to you.”

Taking the letter, Kakashi noticed it was indeed meant for him. _Clearly_ meant as it could only be completely opened with his chakra. He sent a gentle pulse through it and the text appeared.

Half an hour later, despite the medic yelling at him about his injuries, he was rushing back to Konoha ahead of his team. The words in that cursed piece of paper were burnt into his mind and he hadn’t even needed the Sharingan to do that.

_As an order directly from The Hokage, you are to come back to Konoha and abort your current mission. Umino Iruka is in danger from his previous condition._

  
  


He hadn’t even spent a day in the hospital and he was done. _So done._ Iruka couldn’t even name half the things attached to him, and the constant flow of nurses coming in and out of the room was getting on his nerves.

Being annoyed was better than slowly getting more scared. Iruka tried to focus on how irritating the situation was because if he started to think about it more he’d get to the pain, dying and Kakashi. And those were not thoughts he was willing to have.

Especially when it was clear Kakashi may not come to save him. The almost sorry look the Hokage had given him while briefly visiting told enough. Most likely he was out on a mission, days away from Konoha. Possibly having a mission where he couldn’t return. Iruka swallowed and took a shaky breath. It was time to get annoyed again and keep his thoughts at bay.

  
The days passed, and every day gave Iruka a new, interesting but familiar symptom. He was getting more tired than ever, and the headaches got more bad. The sudden collapses on his chakra levels started by the day five and with them came fainting. Iruka really hadn’t missed that or the pain that came with one’s chakra escaping without warning.

Every day the atmosphere got grimmer. The people taking care of him gave him smiles that weren’t happy, there were the mandatory talk about death - which had been awkward since for some unknown reason Gai had been the person to come in and do that. Needless to say he spent the time crying about “lovely youth going away too soon” and Iruka comforting him - and Iruka wasn’t able to see or inform his friends as his condition was tied to an Anbu and therefore classified confidential information. All in all, Iruka was miserable. He was going to die in a hospital room, most likely in pain and without Kakashi, since by the day six there were no sight of him yet.

 

Couple of days later he had made his decision. He was NOT going to die in a hospital. He was a complete wreck anyway, so the least he would do for himself was to drag himself to a nicer place. He didn’t have a plan, but as a former prank master of Konoha he was sure even his tired and headache filled brain would help him when the time was right.

 

He was trying to sleep when he heard quiet voices outside the door. By the sounds it was The Hokage and someone whose voice he didn’t recognize.

“...there’s not enough time. We sent a squad to search for him, but as expected they haven’t been able to locate him.”

There was a silence that stretched for a few minutes.

“The problem is if he comes here too fast he’ll be chakra depleted and unable to help. If he saves his chakra and has to move slowly due to that he may arrive too late.”

A sigh was heard, and Iruka knew it was The Hokage. He had been on the receiving end of that sound way too often as a child. Especially after a prank gone wrong, if someone actually caught him in the act.

 

“We also don’t know if he has injuries that require time to heal or if those will slow him down,” The Hokage thought aloud. The door was opened, people stepping in. Someone whispered _oh, he’s sleeping,_ and Iruka was thankful he still had his eyes closed. Besides not wanting to die in the room he was also way too tired to have the conversation about dying with The Hokage. The old man was important to him and he loved him deeply, but hearing the words from him would be too much. It would break him, Iruka knew, and it would also break the old man. So he kept his eyes closed and breathing steady.

“I’ll come back later when he wakes up,” the Hokage said, voice tired and a bit sad. There was a sound of rustle before the door closed, leaving Iruka once again alone in the room. He waited for a while before he dared to open his eyes. It was time. He was going out for the last time _right now_.

  
  
Getting out of the bed went relatively easy. It took some time for the world stop spinning around but after that it was a piece of cake to get to his clothes. Getting _in_ the clothes was more difficult and had to include sitting on the floor, but he managed. To his surprise there were no Anbu situated behind the hospital door. Actually the whole hallway was empty.

“Isn’t this convenient,” Iruka murmured. He shrugged it off as being lucky, he’s whole body ached even after moving only from the bed to the hallway and he really needed to keep moving. Needed to get out. There was a window open near where he was, and with the support of the walls he made his way to it and slowly climbed out. Without him, well, dying he might have noticed something strange was going on. Like how the presence of The Hokage was near and why there was no nurses or Anbu stopping him from leaving.

After Iruka had left The Third came around the corner to look at the figure disappearing into the distance. He had known Iruka would want to leave. So he had made it easy. It was the least he could do, make the boy feel slightly better when everything was crashing down.

Still, it was in his nature to expect the worst but hope for the best, and that’s why he gestured one of his guards to follow Iruka. If Kakashi managed to make it, it would be a shame if they wouldn’t be able to find the man in the need of saving.

 

Now all they could do was wait.

  
  


When Iruka finally made it to the top of the Hokage monument the night had fallen. It had taken a lot of energy, his head felt like it was going to explode and he had passed out twice, but at least he was now high up looking at the city. He was sitting on the ground with his legs crossed, leaning against a rock as he tried to steady his breathing. The cold night air felt wonderful on his heated skin, and as he watched the last moments of sunset he couldn’t keep his feelings inside any longer.

“I’m really going to die,” Iruka said aloud. It was a statement he needed to make, needed to hear it in the surrounding silence. He didn’t bother wiping the tears away when they came, and as the darkness slowly took over Iruka closed his eyes.

  


“Where is he?”

The Hokage blew smoke out of his mouth. He was still staring out of the open window, but now there was a tired Anbu with blood stains all over him staring at him through the holes of his mask. Leave it to Kakashi to always use the windows as entrance.

“He left,” he started, and seeing the Anbu tense he quickly added: “Cat is with him. They’re on top of the Hokage monument.”

Before the sentence had ended Kakashi was already gone.

  


If someone had asked Iruka what dying would feel like before his current situation he would have said painful. It was a occupational hazard, really, since most ninja tended to lose their lives in terrible ways. Getting stabbed, dying slowly with poison, getting eaten by summons of an enemy, running into a trap and not being able to escape. The life of a ninja included many different and imaginative ways to die, and most of them included pain, torture and fear.

And if it wasn’t enemy who got you, one’s mind was the next silent killer. One could survive multiple enemies, wars and difficult missions, but if your mind was weak you didn’t survive. Not many made it to retirement that came by old age.

Statistically speaking Iruka would’ve guessed losing his life on a mission. That had almost happened, too, so he wasn’t that far off with his guess. Still, his condition was related to a mission, so technically it would be just a post-mission death.

But what surprised him was that he wasn’t in pain. He had been hurting _a lot_ , right after getting on top of the monument, but as time passed the pain faded away - so did everything else, and as he watched the city lights through half closed eyes he just felt warm. Iruka had heard it happen to people who had almost drowned or bled to death, but it wasn’t like he would complain it had happened to him too.

It was peaceful. Quite quiet. He didn’t have strength to move or cry and it was frustrating to wait for death while it felt so nice, but he really didn’t have a choice. Death was a direct consequence of living.

  
There was a gentle feeling of his body moving. Upright, down, Iruka had no idea, but it felt nice. There was a tingling sensation mingling with the warm feeling, spreading through his body, and for some odd reason it gave him some strength to let out a quiet whine.

_“...good, open your eyes, Iruka.”_

Nice. And now, on top of it all, he was hearing voices. Dying proved to be a really, _really_ strange event. So was opening his eyes, since he felt like he should listen to the voice inside his head - even though Iruka was sure there had been a lesson at school named IF YOU HEAR THINGS IN YOUR HEAD, DO NOT LISTEN TO THEM. Well, he had spend most of his time doing pranks, so he most likely missed that class anyway.

So he did as the voice had commanded. He slowly managed to pry his eyes open, feeling like even the dark sky was too bright to look at. There was a person looking down on him, and Iruka realized the same person was actually holding him.

“Good. Focus on me, I’ve got you.”

Iruka waited as his vision started to get clearer. The person was wearing an Anbu mask, but his chakra was familiar. _Kakashi_.

He laughed weakly, regretting it soon as the action seemed to take a lot of energy out of him. “Y-you made it,” he whispered, carefully moving his hand on top of Kakashi’s hand that was mesmerizingly glowing with chakra.

A shudder went through Kakashi’s body and Iruka turned his worried eyes towards him. It was clear his own chakra levels were getting low, but still the other just shook his head. Iruka’s eyes took in the traces of blood on the Anbu gear and how Kakashi seemed to favor his other side. Kakashi noticed his gaze, shaking his head again to get Iruka’s attention away from his injuries. “It’s alright. Don’t worry about me.”

“Of course I worry about you, idiot!” Iruka said. “If you die on me because of this I’ll make sure you’ll regret it.”

“Maa, that’s a really scary threat,” Kakashi laughed. He moved Iruka in a slightly different position to free his other hand to lift up the Anbu mask. And then, to Iruka’s surprise, he lowered his other mask.

“...Is this a bad time to confess I like you?” Iruka whispered, mostly to himself as he took in Kakashi’s features. God, the man was good-looking.

A tired chuckle echoed in the quietness and a gloved hand came to lightly trace the shape of Iruka’s face. “It’s the perfect time,” Kakashi said, a smile on his face as leaned down.

  
  
  


 

“Shouldn’t you be in the hospital? Kakashi, your chakra clearly hasn’t recovered.”

 

Kakashi leaned on the doorframe, trying to look cool but Iruka could see he was actually using the frame as support to keep standing. After the whole situation on top of the Hokage monument they’d both gotten a one-way ticket to hospital due low chakra levels.

 

Iruka was the lucky one, he had gotten out just in three days thanks to Kakashi’s chakra. Just looking at the slight shake of Kakashi’s body told everyone with working eyes Kakashi still lacked healthy chakra levels. He also had the injuries from his mission, not being able to heal as quickly as usual due to lacking the chakra.

“You escaped, didn’t you?” Iruka sighed, raising his hand to rub his temples.

“Don’t worry,” Kakashi cheerfully answered. “I have a permit.” He then proceeded to give Iruka a slightly grumbled note. Iruka took it. Opened it. Kakashi’s mood got better as he watched the frown slowly spread on Iruka’s face.

“Kakashi,” Iruka started. He lifted his gaze to meet the other’s eye. “You have just written ‘I can do what I want’ on this.”

“Exactly,” Kakashi smiled, lowered his mask and gave the now stunned Iruka a kiss.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It’s done! Thank you so much for waiting! Thank you for your praises, comments and kudos! Thank you for patiently waiting for me to update, it meant a lot.
> 
> I might write an extra chapter. I mean I had an idea, but since it took forever and two days to write this I forgot what it was about. But I can always try to write something so please! Encourage me! Give me ideas!
> 
> As you may have noticed I’ve avoided names. Mostly because my will to Google things is weak and pathetic and secondly because I have no memory of anyone from the series. Seriously. 
> 
> <3 - Zäs

**Author's Note:**

> AN: I actually had to google the difference between the words squad and squid. The wonders of languages. Mind you, after writing this I’m not sure I can even speak my native language. Writing makes me question everything.
> 
> Grammar is also the hardest thing ever and words that only have one letter difference (change, chance, price, prize) are my mortal enemies ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
> 
> Happy new year and shit  
> \- Zas


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